*** Resending note of 09/16/94 10:56
 
Well, I've lurked long enough on Museum-l.  In the good spirit (I hope) of
Eric "pet peeve" of NYBG.whatever :-), and what with it being Friday, I
thought I'd add the following to the tiny thread on spamming. This was
forwarded to me from an e-mail pal in response to my queries re: spamming.
 
Sorry this is so long... however, if you print this document and then pour
out all that extra whiteout that's now sitting in a museum supply cabinet
near you...you'll get rid of both.  W/O is a good way to correct grammatical
errors that may have snuck/sneaked into this note too:-) (please don't
respond to this...)
 
Please note that this message came from a user on compuserve.  That's
right, compuserve! :-)  Oh, how I wanted to add to that thread...
 
Anyway, smile everyone.  Have a good weekend.
 
 ---------- Forwarded message ----------
 Subject: You asked about SPAMing?
 
 Subject: The History of SPAM
 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 From:  "The TEAMIBM Network" <[log in to unmask]>
 
 Spam was created by the Scots after the building of Hadrian's wall.  Prior to
 that, the Scots had been in the habit of grazing their cattle in the Southern
 Scottish Lowlands (aka England.) When the beasts had fattened, they'd be
 returned to Scotland for slaughter.
 
 Hadrian misunderstood what was happening, and thought that English cattle were
 being taken north by Scots rustlers. As Hadrian was unable to tell the Scots
 from the English -- they all looked the same to him -- he decided to control
 the cattle rather than the rustlers.  So he built Hadrian's wall, with the aim
 of keeping the cattle out of Scotland.
 
 The Scots reacted by slaughtering the cattle in England;  they placed the meat
 in containers, and sent these back past the Roman guards.  To avoid arousing
 suspicion, the colour and flavour was extracted from the contents, and sent
 back under separate cover to be added back later.
 
 It was the custom of the Romans to avoid as far as possible interference in
 irrelevant local affairs;  to satisfy them that there was nothing unusual
 about the shipments, the containers were labelled "Scottish Pam-Brittanic
 Shipments". (the prefix "pam" is a form of "pan", meaning "everywhere.")
 Later, this was shortened to "Scots Pam-Britannic", then "S Pam-Britannic" and
 finally "Spam".
 
 Tim Martin
 
 MessageID:  19940915110125.CANOPUSA.COMPUSRV (CompuServe #234680)
 
 From:  "John Lederer" <[log in to unmask]>
 To: The TEAMIBM Network 72370,250
 
  > It was the custom ....etc. etc..
  >
 
 Oh, sure , Tim.  That is what it looked like on the surface, and , in fact
 many historians present that side of the story.  But in reality the Scots were
 snookered by the far more intelligent Romans.
 
 Hadrian's minions, in following orders to build the wall, actually ran up
 against a critical shortage of building material.  By the careful use of
 misinformation, they were able to trick the Scots into attempting to smuggle
 their meat past in the form of Spam.  This they confiscated, and used to build
 much of the wall -- indeed many of the surviving portions are actually spam,
 the far weaker stone having weathered away.
 
 Haggis was an attempt by some of the Scots to defeat this plan.  Using druidic
 rites they animated the spam and equipped it with legs, and attempted to drive
 it past the Romans disguised as bald dwarf sheep.  The plan was a good one,
 but many of the haggises escaped and now live in the wild where they are
 hunted in the mountain fastnesses to which they fled, cf. Payne, Phil "Hunting
 the Mountain Haggis for Fun and Profit".
 
 It is interesting to reflect that had the Scots initiated the haggis operation
 earlier, they probably would have succeeded, prevented the building of the
 wall, conquered England, and we would today regard English as unintelligible.
 
 Regards, John